The Moment Where It Ends
It’s always hard. Sitting in the kitchen with a mug of tea in my hand.
Waiting for either of us to say something. Anything. It’s the long moment of
silence that tells me what’s coming next is not good.
He sighs deeply and I take in the movement of his hand as he runs his fingers
through his dark hair. Always a sign. Sometimes it can be good. But today I
sense it’s not.
“What is it Adrian?” I asked impatiently. The atmosphere around us was too
much to bare.
He swallowed hard. His brown eyes looking at everything and everywhere except
me. Then he said “There’s something I need to tell you.”
I abandon my mug of tea and folded my arms across my chest. Adrian knows I
was staring at him. He could feel my penetrating stare. And yet he still does
not look at me.
“What?” I demanded
Eventually Adrian looks up at me. His brown eyes showing sadness mixed with
regret.
Taking a deep breathe he said “I’ve been seeing someone.”
I nodded my head. Only my benefit. Not his. I have been sensing something
like this was coming my way. Now that it has, I don’t know what to say.
“I didn’t mean for it to go on as long as it has. I’m sorry.”
I closed my eyes and fought with myself not to smile. Not because he has said
what I knew. But because I’ve heard a saying.
“There’s a lie for every truth.” I repeated the saying out loud for his
benefit.
I let myself go. I smiled and laughed. Then tears began to fill my eyes.
“You say you’ve been seeing someone,” I said “and I believe you. That’s the
truth. The lie?” I paused for moment and took in the look of pain on his face.
Then I continued “You meant for it to carry on. There’s no hiding that.”
He looked a little defeated. I’ve caught onto his game.
“How long have you known?” He asked
Adrian folded his arm across his chest and stared at me with unpleasing eyes.
He wanted to pass the blame onto me.
“I’ve known for a while.” I said confidently “I was just waiting for you to
confirm it. And now you have.”
He was now getting frustrated. He swallowed hard and then said “You like
playing this game! Trying to make me feel even worse. I’ve told you the truth
damn it!” He raised his voice on that last sentence.
I simply sighed and shrugged my shoulders. Then I said “It’s good you should
feel even worse. Know why?”
He only looked at me with a blank face. So for his benefit I continued
“Because you’re in the wrong. Telling me what I already suspected wasn’t going
to push it away. What did you think? That telling me would make me forgive you?
You and I hugging and kissing, pretending this conversation never happened?”
“Well… yeah.” Adrian said “I mean that’s what happens right?”
“Only in the movies.” I said sadly
He sighed deeply and the room fell silent once more.
It’s even harder to sit and wait for him to move. There’s no question. He’s
in the wrong so he needs to move out. One thing that’s always been settled.
Eventually Adrian started to walk out of the room. But then he stopped just
beside me. He looked at me and then gently kissed my forehead.
He moved away reluctantly and then left the room.
I smiled sadly to myself. In the morning he will be gone. And all this will
be over.
The End.
Waiting for either of us to say something. Anything. It’s the long moment of
silence that tells me what’s coming next is not good.
He sighs deeply and I take in the movement of his hand as he runs his fingers
through his dark hair. Always a sign. Sometimes it can be good. But today I
sense it’s not.
“What is it Adrian?” I asked impatiently. The atmosphere around us was too
much to bare.
He swallowed hard. His brown eyes looking at everything and everywhere except
me. Then he said “There’s something I need to tell you.”
I abandon my mug of tea and folded my arms across my chest. Adrian knows I
was staring at him. He could feel my penetrating stare. And yet he still does
not look at me.
“What?” I demanded
Eventually Adrian looks up at me. His brown eyes showing sadness mixed with
regret.
Taking a deep breathe he said “I’ve been seeing someone.”
I nodded my head. Only my benefit. Not his. I have been sensing something
like this was coming my way. Now that it has, I don’t know what to say.
“I didn’t mean for it to go on as long as it has. I’m sorry.”
I closed my eyes and fought with myself not to smile. Not because he has said
what I knew. But because I’ve heard a saying.
“There’s a lie for every truth.” I repeated the saying out loud for his
benefit.
I let myself go. I smiled and laughed. Then tears began to fill my eyes.
“You say you’ve been seeing someone,” I said “and I believe you. That’s the
truth. The lie?” I paused for moment and took in the look of pain on his face.
Then I continued “You meant for it to carry on. There’s no hiding that.”
He looked a little defeated. I’ve caught onto his game.
“How long have you known?” He asked
Adrian folded his arm across his chest and stared at me with unpleasing eyes.
He wanted to pass the blame onto me.
“I’ve known for a while.” I said confidently “I was just waiting for you to
confirm it. And now you have.”
He was now getting frustrated. He swallowed hard and then said “You like
playing this game! Trying to make me feel even worse. I’ve told you the truth
damn it!” He raised his voice on that last sentence.
I simply sighed and shrugged my shoulders. Then I said “It’s good you should
feel even worse. Know why?”
He only looked at me with a blank face. So for his benefit I continued
“Because you’re in the wrong. Telling me what I already suspected wasn’t going
to push it away. What did you think? That telling me would make me forgive you?
You and I hugging and kissing, pretending this conversation never happened?”
“Well… yeah.” Adrian said “I mean that’s what happens right?”
“Only in the movies.” I said sadly
He sighed deeply and the room fell silent once more.
It’s even harder to sit and wait for him to move. There’s no question. He’s
in the wrong so he needs to move out. One thing that’s always been settled.
Eventually Adrian started to walk out of the room. But then he stopped just
beside me. He looked at me and then gently kissed my forehead.
He moved away reluctantly and then left the room.
I smiled sadly to myself. In the morning he will be gone. And all this will
be over.
The End.